Homework

The Loony Bin ( loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk )
Wed, 5 Mar 1997 18:14:32 +0000


Hiya People...

Here's something on homework...

Wishes & Dreams...

- ANDREA
        xx

***<andrea@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk>****<ajc6@ukc.ac.uk>***
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***                 THE LOONY BIN                   ***
***           loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk          ***
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*******************Internet Goddess********************
**********************ANDROMEDA************************

  ------- Forwarded foolishness follows -------

Athens, Greece -- The parents of a Greek medical student have been
sentenced to four months in prison for stealing bones from a cemetery to
aid their son's study of the human anatomy.

"It is the first time that such a bizarre case has been heard here,"
said Achilleas Zissis, district prosecutor of the city of Serres.

Philip and Evangelia Danglis were found guilty of "disrespect of the
dead" and sentenced by a three-member tribunal Friday, Zissis said.

The move came two years after the wife of the deceased filed charges
against the parents, accusing them of sneaking into the local cemetery,
stealing her spouse's bones and mailing them to Bulgaria where the
Danglis' son was attending medical school.

The Danglis said their son planned to return the bones after studying
them, Zissis said. 

WhiteBoard News for Wednesday, January 22, 1997


HOMEWORK EXCUSES

I was in a store and a robber held everyone up at gun point. All the
store had in the register were checks so the robbers got angry and were
about to shoot everyone when, thinking fast, I grabbed my homework and
textbooks and convinced him that an education was more valuable than any
amount of money. He took my books and all my papers but didn't shoot
anyone, although I almost didn't offer him because I value my education
almost as much as my life, but I couldn't let him shoot all those
innocent people.

I spent the entire night working on it, but I just wasn't proud of it,
so I'm going to work on it again tonight.

Well, this lady was giving birth in the middle of nowhere.  I heard if
you don't have anything around, one of the most sterile things you can
wrap a newborn baby in was newsprint.  All I had was my homework and
text book....you understand don't you?

It spontaneously combusted... nearly burned our whole house down.
Fortunately everyone except the goldfish managed to escape.  Poor
Skippy.

I felt it wasn't challenging enough.

You see, I was doing my homework outside when a U.F.O. landed in the
field next to my house and a little man came out and I felt he needed a
gift because he had come so far and so I gave it to him, honest.

My mother forgot to do it.

I was doing it on my computer when it suddenly bleeped and I lost
everything I had done for the past FOUR HOURS and I was too tired to
redo it but I will have it by tomorrow honest.

I was too emotionally traumatized after seeing on last nights news the
tragedy & human suffering that is unfolding in Bosnia.

I used it for the bird cage lining.

I was about to do it, and then, well, I just got to thinking about how
much you look like Sharon Stone...

- Chris <cwang@detour.com>


TOP TEN REASONS STUDYING IS BETTER THAN SEX!

10. You can usually find someone to do it with.

9. If you get tired, you can stop, save your place and pick up where you
left off.

8. You can finish early without feelings of guilt or shame.

7. When you open a book, you don't have to worry about who else has
opened it.

6. A little coffee and you can do it all night.

5. If you don't finish a chapter you won't gain a reputation as a "book
teaser."

4. You can do it, eat and watch TV all at the same time.

3. You don't get embarrassed if your parents interrupt you in the
middle.

2. You don't have to put your beer down to do it.

1. If you aren't sure what you're doing, you can always ask your
roommate for help!

- Donated by Daniel Dickinsen radiop@usa.pipeline.com