Gerbil...

The Loony Bin ( andrea@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk )
9 Mar 1998 01:23:37 -0000


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Hiya All...

This one came from Alan a long time ago...and isn't suitable for
children...

Wishes & Dreams...

- ANDREA
	xx

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***                 THE LOONY BIN                   ***
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**********************ANDROMEDA************************

  ------- Forwarded foolishness follows -------

>From the pages of the Los Angeles Times...

"In retrospect, lighting the match was my big mistake. But I was
only trying to retrieve the gerbil," Eric Tomaszewski told
bemused doctors in the Severe Burns Unit of Salt Lake City
Hospital. 

Tomaszewski, and his homosexual partner Andrew "Kiki" Farnum,
had been admitted for emergency treatment after a felching
session had gone seriously wrong.

"I pushed a cardboard tube up his rectum and slipped Raggot, our
gerbil, in," he explained. "As usual, Kiki shouted out
"Armageddon", my cue that he'd had enough. I tried to retrieve
Raggot but he wouldn't come out again, so I peered into the tube
and struck a match, thinking the light might attract him."

At a hushed press conference, a hospital spokesman described
what happened next.

"The match ignited a pocket of intestinal gas and a flame shot
out of the tube, igniting Mr Tomaszewski's hair and severely
burning his face. It also set fire to the gerbil's fur and
whiskers which in turn ignited a larger pocket of gas further up
the intestine, propelling the rodent out like a cannonball."

Tomaszewski suffered second degree burns and a broken nose from
the impact of the gerbil, while Farnum suffered first and second
degree burns to his anus and lower intestinal tract.

[Yes, but what happened to the gerbil!?!?!?!?]

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