Love, Lust or Marriage..???

The Loony Bin ( loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk )
Sun, 8 Sep 1996 17:16:01 +0100


Hiya All...

How to tell the difference between love, lust and marriage...

Wishes & Dreams...

- ANDREA
        xx

************<andrea@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk>************
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*********************ANDROMEDA***********************

  ------- Forwarded foolishness follows -------


How do you know if you're in love, lust, or marriage?


LOVE       when your eyes meet across a crowded room
LUST       when your tongues meet across a crowded room
MARRIAGE   when your belt won't meet around your waist, and you
           don't care

LOVE       when intercourse is called making love
LUST       all other times
MARRIAGE   what's intercourse?

LOVE       when you argue over how many children to have
LUST       When you argue over who gets the wet spot
MARRIAGE   when you argue over money

LOVE       when you share everything you own
LUST       when you think twice about giving your partner bus money
MARRIAGE   when the bank owns everything

LOVE       when it doesn't matter if you don't climax
LUST       when the relationship is over if you don't climax
MARRIAGE   what's a climax?

LOVE       when you phone each other just to say "Gidday"
LUST       when you phone each other just to organize sex
MARRIAGE   when you phone each other to find out what time your son's
           game starts

LOVE       when you write poems about your partner
LUST       when all you write is your phone number
MARRIAGE   when all you write are cheques

LOVE       when you show concern for your partners' feelings
LUST       when you couldn't give a shit
MARRIAGE   when your only concern is what's on TV

LOVE       when your farewell is "I love you darling"
LUST       when your farewell is "So, same time next week?"
MARRIAGE   when your farewell is silent

LOVE       when you are proud to be seen in public with your partner
LUST       when you only ever see each other in the bedroom
MARRIAGE   when you never see each other awake

LOVE       when your heart flutters every time you see them
LUST       when your groin twitches every time you see them
MARRIAGE   when your wallet empties every time you see them

LOVE       when nobody else matters
LUST       when nobody else knows
MARRIAGE   when everybody else matters and you don't care who knows

LOVE       when all the songs on the radio describe exactly how you feel
LUST       when it's just the same mushy old shit
MARRIAGE   when you never listen to music

LOVE       when breaking up is something you try not to think about
LUST       when staying together is something you try not to think about
MARRIAGE   when just getting through today is your only thought

LOVE       when you're interested in everything your partner does
LUST       when you're only interested in one thing
MARRIAGE   when you're not interested in what your partner does and
           the one thing you're interested in is your golf score