The Loony Bin
(
loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk
)
Sun, 15 Dec 1996 18:18:17 +0000
Hiya Folks... Here's a definition of some readers of news...I come in part way through 'Hacker' I think... Wishes & Dreams... - ANDREA xx ***<andrea@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk>****<ajc6@ukc.ac.uk>*** ***<bloodaxe@geocities.com>***<bloodaxe@bigfoot.com>*** *** *** *** THE LOONY BIN *** *** loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk *** *** Archive: http://eleceng.ukc.ac.uk/~pjw/loonies/ *** *** *** *******************Internet Goddess******************** **********************ANDROMEDA************************ ------- Forwarded foolishness follows ------- BEGINNER: - Thinks rn is a typo. - Posts empty articles. - Wonders what `@' means. - Accidently sends (empty) mail messages to other readers. NOVICE: - Knows how to read news, but seldom does, since s/he hasn't learned how to (un)subscribe to a subject. - Posts the programmer-lightbulb joke to soc.women. - Tries to post his/her KILL files. - Posts articles asking what `:-)' means, and misspells it. - Wonders why people go to all the trouble of typing in other people's articles with all those silly ">"s. USER: - Knows how to post followups, but uses ed to do so. - Posts articles asking what `SO', `BTW', and `MOTOS' mean. - Has heard of KILL files, but doesn't know what they are. - Has worn out the `n' key. - Still reads rec.humor KNOWLEDGEABLE USER: - Knows about .signature files, but sometimes includes them twice. - Posts flames to net.announce.newusers. - Uses KILL files, but only on "Subject:" lines. - Has learned to edit the "followups to:" line. - Can save a rot13'd joke, and read it later. EXPERT: - Knows how to post anonymously, from nonexistent sites. - Posts flames about users of "notes." - Has 0.1 megabytes of KILL files, and 5 megabytes of mail. - Is known by name at virtually all news sites. - Knows how to post rot13'd jokes, and can read them without saving and exiting. HACKER: - Knows how to create new newsgroups. - Has modified local version of vnews to allow longer postings. - Uses rmgroup instead of KILL files. - Knows how to send mail through the ARPANET. - Can read rot13'd text without unrotating it. GURU: - Has private database of alternate paths to all sites. - Has caused at least one newsgroup to be eliminated due to low signal/noise. - Name appears in over 1000 KILL files (at other sites). - Uses undocumented features of rn. - Moderates at least one newsgroup. WIZARD: - Thinks rn is a typo.