The Loony Bin
(
loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk
)
Sun, 4 Aug 1996 02:40:21 +0100
Hiya Folks...
Some people just naturally aren't very bright...
Wishes & Dreams...
- ANDREA
xx
************<andrea@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk>************
*****<ajc6@ukc.ac.uk>***<bloodaxe@geocities.com>*****
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*** THE LOONY BIN ***
*** loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk ***
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******************Internet Goddess*******************
*********************ANDROMEDA***********************
------- Forwarded foolishness follows -------
Some stupid criminals....
45 year-old Amy Brasher was arrested in San Antonio, Texas, after a
mechanic reported to police that 18 packages of marijuana were packed in
the engine compartment of the car which she had brought to the mechanic
for an oil change. According to police, Brasher later said that she
didn't realize that the mechanic would have to raise the hood to change
the oil.
Portsmouth, R.I. Police charged Gregory Rosa, 25, with a string of
vending machine robberies in January when he (1) fled from police
inexplicably when they spotted him loitering around a vending machine
and (2) later tried to post his $400 bail in coins.
Karen Lee Joachimmi, 20, was arrested in Lake City, Florida for robbery
of a Howard Johnson's motel. She was armed with only an electric chain
saw, which was not plugged in.
The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a Burger
King in Ypsilanti, Michigan at 7:50am, flashed a gun and demanded cash.
The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open the cash
register without a food order. When the man ordered onion rings, the
clerk said they weren't available for breakfast. The man, frustrated,
walked away.
David Posman, 33, was arrested recently in Providence, R.I, after
allegedly knocking out an armored car driver and stealing the closest
four bags of money. It turned out they contained $800 in PENNIES,
weighed 30 pounds each, and slowed him to a stagger during his getaway
so that police officers easily jumped him from behind.
The Belgian news agency Belga reported in November that a man suspected
of robbing a jewelry store in Liege said he couldn't have done it
*because he was busy breaking into a school at the same time.* Police
then arrested him for breaking into the school.
Drug-possession defendant Christopher Johns, on trial in March in
Pontiac, Michigan, said he had been searched without a warrant. The
prosecutor said the officer didn't need a warrant because a "bulge" in
Christopher's jacket could have been a gun. Nonsense, said Christopher,
who happened to be wearing the same jacket that day in court. He handed
it over so the judge could see it. The judge discovered a packet of
cocaine in the pocket and laughed so hard he required a five-minute
recess to compose himself.
Atlanta Braves pitcher John Smoltz gave himself five-inch-long welts in
March when he tried to iron his polo shirt while wearing it. "I've
ironed that way five or six times," he said, "and never had it happen."
Dave so-and-so of Anniston, Alabama, was injured recently after he
attempted to replace a tubelike fuse in his Chevy pickup with a
22-caliber rifle bullet (used because it was a perfect fit). However,
when electricity heated the bullet, it went off and shot him in the
knee.