The Loony Bin
(
loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk
)
Fri, 26 Jul 1996 04:50:12 +0100
Hiya Loonies...
More pessimism for you...
Wishes & Dreams...
- ANDREA
xx
************<andrea@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk>************
******************<ajc6@ukc.ac.uk>*******************
*** ***
*** THE LOONY BIN ***
*** loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk ***
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******************Internet Goddess*******************
*********************ANDROMEDA***********************
------- Forwarded foolishness follows -------
A pessimist is an optimist with experience.
Man who looks for a pink slip before the money in his pay envelope.
Pessimism wouldn't work *any*way.
A pessimist is someone who feels bad when he feels good, for fear he'll
feel even worse when he feels better.
A pessimist is a person who has had to listen to too many optimists.
Don Marquis
The man who is a pessimist before fourty-eight knows too much; the man=20
who is an optimist after fourty-eight knows too little. Mark Twain
Pessimism, when you get used to it, is just as agreeable as optimism.
Arnold Bennett
There is no sadder sight than a young pessimist, except an old optimist.
Mark Twain
A pessimist is a man who thinks all woman are bad. An optimist is one=20
who hopes they are. Chauncey Depew
A pessimist is just an optimist who has received his degree from the=20
school of hard knocks.
An optimist invented the jet; a pessimist, the ejection seat.
An optimist laughs to forget; a pessimist can't remember the last time=20
he laughed.
The pessimist calls the police to report a disturbance of the peace when
opportunity knocks.
Blessed are the pessimists for they have already invested in a tape=20
backup.
The pessimist is just a verbose realist.
No sense being a pessimist. That value system probably wouldn't work=20
anyway.
Pessimists make poor bankers. They don't expect their money back.
Corollary: Look for a pessimist from whom to borrow.
The pessimist is rarely disappointed.
How many pessimists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
---None, it's just a waste of time since the new one probably won't work
either.
---None, why bother, the new one will eventually burn out as well.
---None, the burned out one is probably stuck and can=B4t be removed.
A typical pessimist joke:
How does one make God laugh?
Tell him your plans for the future.
Pessimism is the one ism which kills the soul. John Buchan (1875-1940)
........
A pessimist is a man who thinks everybody as nasty as himself, and hates
them for it. G. B. Shaw (1856-1950)
........
Pessimist: One who, when he has the choice of two evils, chooses both.
Oscar Wilde (1856-1900)