The Loony Bin
(
loonies@bloodaxe.demon.co.uk
)
Sun, 7 Apr 1996 20:13:38 +0100
To make you feel confident...
From...The Keepers of the Lists
http://www.dtd.com/keepers/keepers.cgi?toplist+4/7/1996
[Dr. Fellowbug's Laboratory of Fun & Horror]
Top 30 Signs Your Job Interview is Not Going Too Well
1 interviewer says YOUR FIRED then he calls the police.
2 Interviewer folds your resume into a paper airplane and throws it out
the window.
3 You notice your inteviewer has written a big NO next to your name.
4 The interviewer makes a phone call and says "Hello, Security..."
5 Beautiful female interviewer catches you staring at her chest.
6 The interviewer falls off his chair laughing.
7 The interviewer says "Didn't I see you on America's Most Wanted?"
8 Interviewer looks at you and says No Hablo - Not quite so desperado.
9 You Find your interveiwer drawing Swiggly lines on you resume and
Heart signs next to your wifes work Number.
10 The interviewer is breaking out in a bigger sweat than you are -
plus his face is red and he's growling.
11 You overhear the interviewer tell his secretary to make copies of
your resume "for the office party".
12 Interviewer doodle pad says 'Butthead, butthead, butthead...' over
and over in large letters.
13 You notice the interviewer making little cartoon drawinngs on your
resume.
14 The interviewer seems to be staring right through you into the TV in
the lounge where they are running reruns of the Simpsons.
15 When asked about your hobbies, you respond "Reading Keepers of the
Lists"
16 The interviewer says, "Mind if I slit my wrists?"
17 You find out your interviewer is a temp that happened to be
available at the time.
18 The pizza delivery boy shows up.
19 Raised eyebrows when the interviewer sees your former employer was
the US Postal Service.
20 You respond to ``what do you think of Keepers of Lists?'' with
``Read it once, didn't like it.''
21 "You have the right to remain silent, anything you say..."
22 The interviewer brings a book to read.
23 You find yourself responding "I take the fifth"
24 He starts by saying well there's nothing better on TV.
25 Lousey intviewer Says cant undestand Your speaking Englandish.
26 They offer you a drink... and lace it with Arsenic.
27 It's World War One.
28 The interviewer begins to snore.
29 You begin to realize that the interview isn't going well at all.
30 The interviewer seems uninterested in continuing.
--
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******************<ajc6@ukc.ac.uk>*******************
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