UNIX

Chris Bellingham ( CBellingham@ncmi-ny.com )
Thu, 21 Mar 96 07:45:30 -0500


Some of you may have seen this before, but I'll post it anyway for those  
that haven't.


         Funny Unix csh/sh commands:
         ===========================
         % cat "food in cans"
         cat: can't open food in cans

         % nice man woman
         No manual entry for woman.

         % rm God
         rm: God nonexistent

         % ar t God
         ar: God does not exist

         % ar r God
         ar: creating God

         % "How would you rate Quayle's incompetence?
         Unmatched ".

         % [Where is Jimmy Hoffa?
         Missing ].

         % ^How did the sex change operation go?
         ^ Modifier failed.

         % If I had a ( for every $ the Congress spent, what
           would I have?
         Too many ('s.

         % make love
         Make: Don't know how to make love. Stop.

         % sleep with me
         bad character

         % got a light?
         No match.

         % man: why did you get a divorce?
         man:: Too many arguments.

         % !:say, what is saccharine?
         Bad substitute.

         % %blow
         %blow: No such job.

         /* not csh but sh */
         $ PATH=pretending!/usr/ucb/which sense
         no sense in pretending!

         $ drink <bottle; opener
         bottle: cannot open
         opener: not found